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#46 When your husband spits in the Nutella jar


I have challenges with Nutella. You probably know that by now. I accept that. And I would bet my butt that I am not alone in this one. Nutella is one of the greatest creations ever. Chocolate is amazing for starters. But when it’s slightly melted and can be spread on things like bread, bananas and strawberries, we’re talking a whole different ball game here. But sometimes that bread, banana and strawberry just gets in the way of the Nutella. So what do you do? You walk excitedly over to the cutlery drawer, grab your spoon of choice, and sit down comfortably with your jar of Nutella. Is it gluttonous? It sure is! But I’m okay with that; until my stomach starts to make noises like a lion has taken over the insides of my small intestine, and my eyes start to roll in the back of my head. That’s when I know I’m in trouble, and need an intervention. My husband eventually finds me curled up in a fetal position, rocking back and forth, holding onto the jar for life, with Nutella all over my face; including my eyelashes and ear. Slowly and gently he leans down in front of me and asks if I’m okay, to which I turn my head left and right indicating that I was not. He softly asks if he can take the jar from my hands. I nod yes, though am resistant to his efforts. He pries it out of my hands, nearly falling backwards in the process and stands up to throw it in the garbage. I gasp when I hear the thud of the jar in the garbage can, even though I know it was the right decision. But I know something that he doesn’t. I’ve gone back into the garbage before – especially when there’s a tight lid protecting the goods. When I reveal that to him, he stares at me for a moment while processing, then without hesitation, he takes it out, removes the lid, spits in the jar and then throws it back in the bag. Problem solved.

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